Gemma I love this time of year, the whole month of December is filled with traditions big and small in our family. A month of creating, keeping, adapting and letting go of traditions so that we can come together for real connection and family time.
Family life is busy, as parents we are all juggling the many responsibilities on our plate. It can be hard to find the time to connect in the day to day. Although December comes with different pressures for us it is also a time to create and keep traditions that bring us together. The traditions we keep transport us back in time to our childhood, to the times we shared with our family.
Limiting distractions
In 2023 I have purposely disconnected from screens during the children’s school holidays and most weekends. This has helped me to switch off from distraction, work, social media etc. It has encouraged me to connect more meaningfully to the moments and the people in front of me.
If you feeling pressured to do more because you see others share experiences online I recommend doing the opposite. Switch off from screens, share less, slow down and reconnect with the simple things in front of you. Our children don’t need reels and pictures to know what it felt like to be with us creating memories together.
Traditions don’t have to be big and expensive either. Some of my favourite Christmas traditions are decorating our tree with the children, watching films snuggled up, making homemade mince pies and being together with our family around the table eating homemade food.
Keeping traditions
My parents have always created and maintained traditions that bring us together as a family. My Dad’s philosophy is that time together, as a family, is the most important priority in life.
My parents create these opportunities for our family to be together, they flex and adapt to our changing needs of us all. This is driven by their belief that family time is central to everything else.
This has influenced how we do family life. One of the most important parts of keeping traditions alive is having a willingness and openness to adapt and grow so that they continue to fit and bring joy.
Creating traditions
This year is the 19th Christmas Jim and I have shared. Over the years we have created lots of little traditions of our own. Especially so since having children. One of the traditions Jim started was making Rick Stein’s Provençal picnic sandwich in the week leading up to Christmas.
This is a fresh, tasty meal in an otherwise indulgent week. Every year Jim makes that sandwich with the children. Together they scoop out the bread, build the layers and sample ingredients. We all sit down around the 22nd to have a slice for lunch. It’s a special tradition we keep and years from now I know that these little moments will connect the children to home and bring these memories to life again.
Letting go of traditions
Sometimes traditions stop working as families grow, priorities and values change and life moves forward. If you are keeping a tradition that doesn’t work and doesn’t bring you joy. If you can’t adapt the tradition then it is ok to let it go. This includes letting go of the expectations and beliefs we hold around them. Do what works for you and your family.
This year we are hosting a big family party on Christmas evening instead of the usual tradition of hosting Christmas dinner for 15. We have chosen to have a more relaxed, quieter Christmas Day and then throw a big party at night time instead.
It’s ok to let go, makes changes and adapt the way you have previously done things. I think that letting go of the old is a great way to find new opportunities.
Whatever traditions you are creating, keeping, adapting and letting go of, I hope that they serve as a means of bringing real connection for your family this Christmas.
